


Vroom Vroom Motherfucker

by GothMoth



Series: Phantom Phang Phucking Phreaking Phantastical Phabulous Phic Phight Phics 1.0 (The 2019 Edition Revamped) [15]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: (Yes This Is A Real Car), Birthday, Birthday Presents, Cars, Comedy, Fast Cars, Gen, Giving Sam The Hearse She Deserves, Hobson The Only Good Thing To Come Out Of Living LArge, Knowing Rich People Is Awesome, Poor Cops Of Amity Park, Poor Hobson, Reckless Driving, Street Racing, danny's a little shit, expensive cars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:21:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29120370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothMoth/pseuds/GothMoth
Summary: Danny has an adrenaline problem and Vlad finds the boys’ birthday to be the best time to buy into it. Queue expensive cars and stupid reckless ‘if-I-wasn’t-already-dead-this-would-probably-kill-me’ driving.Oh, and milkshakes happen (you will never be free Hobs. Never)
Series: Phantom Phang Phucking Phreaking Phantastical Phabulous Phic Phight Phics 1.0 (The 2019 Edition Revamped) [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1994581
Comments: 5
Kudos: 55





	Vroom Vroom Motherfucker

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ghostanimal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostanimal/gifts).



> Previously: 7,456k

Danny wakes up that morning expecting fancy pancakes and unusually flavoured milkshakes. Grinning, he pulls on his heavily over-sized NASA sweater and hops down the stairs two at a time. Unsurprisingly, he is indeed greeted by plentiful pancakes. Now what’s _actually_ surprising is that he’s also greeted by Hobson; who's holding a tray with a milkshake on it (that last part’s not really surpassing though). 

Danny blinks, looking to his parents, “did you guys really hire him just for my birthday?”, then smiling devilishly at Hobson, “I fully intend to drown in milkshakes today”, at which Hobson looks quite disgusted. Still Hobson responds dutifully, “as you wish, sir”, which just makes Danny smirk and chuckle. 

Taking his first of many milkshakes from him, Danny has a sip as his parents give him a plate of pancakes. “Kiwi and fudge? I think I know whose idea that was”, Danny laughs, as Jack gives a thumbs up at Hobson.

While Danny’s chowing down he suddenly hears what sounds like wind being whipped really fast. It takes only a minute or two for everyone else -who lack ghostly enhanced hearing- to notice. Hobson already looks exhausted. As the sound gets louder Danny realises it’s a freaking helicopter. Danny practically shouts, “now what!”, while Jack runs out guns in tow. 

Looking out the window Danny sees a car? Placed onto the ground with a massive neon green bow on top. Making him mutter to himself, “you’ve got to be kidding me”, as Jazz claps him on the back. 

Getting up, the two walk outside to join their parents, who thankfully have lowered their weapons. The last thing the road needed was an exploded helicopter and car. They’ve already plucked the card from the bow and hand it to Danny as he comes out. Danny groans, “Vlad? Seriously?”, then muttering quietly to himself, “you can’t bribe me into being your apprentice, but I will take your car and check it for bugs, you crazy frootloop”. 

Jazz leans over him and looks down at the note, “he really is lonely isn’t he?” They both snicker as Danny actually notices the handwritten letter inside the card. Danny hands the card itself to Jazz as he reads the letter. 

_‘Iţ’̧s y̸o͟u͜r 16t̸h ̧so consi͏d͟e̴r̶ th͢i͘s̴ ̕a̕ ŗare day ͞of ̷rest̡.͜ ͡I am not̛ so e̕vi̕l as̛ ̸t͢o͏ ͢not̴ gift͟ ͠yo͝u̡ ap̷pr͡o̧p̷ri̛at̸ely, ͠t͟h͟oug̶h ͘you͟ m͝a͞y̸ ̷th̨in͢ķ ̵I ͜a͜m.̸ I̢n ̡case you̧ ̴w̧is̵h to̧ b̢r͠a̢g͞, ̡i̛t͏’̡s̸ ͞a ͘W Motors̕ L̛y̢ka͡n ͡Hy͜p̡ersp͢o̶rţ. ͡T̕h͡i̶s̴ ̧i͢s̵ ͟th̴e 3͘rd͘ o̸ne t͡o ̶be ҉own̛ed͜ ̡by̶ ҉a͟ ͏si͜n̕g̛le ͏per̷s̡o̢n. ̸I̶t҉ has͡ 420̨ em̡e͢ralds͡ e͝m̢b̴edded i̡n҉ it̨s͜ ͏ḩe̸adligh͏ts,̛ w̡h̢it͏e gol̨d̷ stitchi͡n͜g ͜on the ̡seats ̵a͢nd͟ ţh̶e co̸ļour͏ nam͏e ͏i̡s ͟L͘yk͟a͘n ̷W̨h̴it͏e. Top s͟p͡e̶ed is arou͢n̡d͜ ͏400 k̢m͠/h a̢nd goe͏s 0̕-̛1̡0͞0 i̴n 2̡.3 sec̴o̸n͘d̷s̛.͢ H͘a͡v͘e fun̶ ̷l҉itt̛le̕ b̶a̕dger̷’._

By the time Danny’s done reading the letter, his mouth has gone dry from hanging open so long and his sister is poking him. “Danny, I think this card is made from freaking _silver_ with gold font. He is really trying hard”. 

Danny looks at his sister, finally closing his mouth, “Jazz, I think this may be the most expensive car either of us will ever see in our entire existences”, Danny’s holding the letter like it’s a bomb, but with Vlad it just might be. 

Danny goes up and tentatively pokes the car, when nothing happens he pulls the bow off. Underneath is a fancy looking manual featuring more of Vlad’s handwriting, though in English rather than Ghost Speak this time.

_‘So you don’t destroy it and don’t worry about a license, just turn on the hologram’._

Danny rolls his eyes at this, “you are a madman. How would that help, I only have a learners”. Jack comes up and slaps him on the back, “who cares? All Fenton’s are great drivers! I can’t believe V-man would go this all out!”, muttering at the ground in slight confusion, “especially when he didn’t get Jazzy anything”. 

Maddie is highly suspicious of the car just like Danny, but Danny’s the only one who really knows _why_ Vlad would be gifting him _specifically_. After all, you can’t be archenemies without being close and knowing each rather well. And he wanted Danny as _his son_ , viewed him as _his son_. And well, knowing that, who wouldn’t gift their ‘son’ a present on his birthday. 

Regardless, Danny smiles at Jack and nods to Maddie, “I think I’ll have a look around inside”. So he flops down on the steps and starts looking through the manual for how to open this bloody thing. Jazz elbows him in the side, “I’m pretty sure you’ll need these, Danny”. Danny chuckles as he takes the absurd looking key from her. It looks oddly like a very pointy triangle-shaped USB stick, with a badger tail on a keychain attached to it. Figures. He chuckles, “uh, I’m not sure if that’s supposed to be a threat and Sam’s going to hate it”. 

After he figures out how to not only unlock and open it, but as well as how to turn the whole thing on. Danny walks up and opens it up, doors opening backwards since the hinges are by the seats instead of the dashboard. Danny mutters, “it just keeps getting more flashy and absurd doesn’t it?”, while Jazz chuckles.

Danny snoops around the car, climbing in the back seats, and poking his head intangibly through the back wall into the trunk. He’s glad for the tinted windows since it blocks anyone from seeing what he’s doing; which is probably exactly why Vlad opted for said tinted windows. As he goes he opens every little pocket and looks in any grooves or holes, for traps or anti-ghost stuff. Finding nothing, though he’s sure there must be at least one camera in here because this is _Vlad_ , Danny plops down into the driver's seat.

Sticking the key in, Danny starts it up with a low purr. Sitting in the white and black cyber looking seat Danny can’t help but find it incredibly cool. He laughs to himself, “Dash is going to be _pissed_ ”. As Jack comes ‘round to the window, “this thing is way too tiny for me, so how about you and Mads take it for a spin?”, Danny nods as he opens the passenger door. Maddie can’t help but run her hands over the dashboard as she gets in. She nods to her son, trusting that he checked the car for anything fishy, buckling up.

Danny looks forward, out the windshield, and guns it. Danny laughs, “Vlad was not kidding! this thing can go fast! holy shit!”, as both him and his mom yelp. Getting the car up to eighty-five -well over the speed limit- almost instantaneously. Luckily, there was no cops around and even if there was, they likely wouldn’t care as soon as they saw two Fenton’s inside. Danny had learned last year that no cops were even _willing_ to pull Fenton’s over, due to multiple ghost incidents. That, and the fact that the GAV was a verifiable tank of a vehicle; thing could crush a police cruiser. 

Maddie can’t help but laugh excitedly, “now that is power, I wish some of our weapons would kick up that fast! And that wasn’t even with you actually trying to!”. Danny joins her in slightly adrenaline-fuelled laughter. While he takes a few unnecessarily sharp turns purely to see just how tight this thing can pull. His mom yelling, “Danny!”, as she’s jerked to the side of her seat by the g-force. Danny, meanwhile, just whistles as he does a very sharp u-turn to head home.

They’re gone for only half an hour and look like they had been on a roller coaster. Jack bounces up to them, giddy, “wow that was fast! Wonder if we could hook any guns up to this baby?”. Jazz immediately shakes her head, “we don’t need any more ghost weirdness at school and-”, with a glare in Danny’s direction, “- _no one_ will be chasing ghosts in his car”. Danny one hundred percent intends to though, because if he wants to show this off to anyone it’s Technus. Who will likely stop fighting altogether just to stare at it. Danny can barely contain his smirk. 

Eventually, they do actually park it in the garage, making sure nothing can fall on the multimillion-dollar car. So that Danny can go back in for more pancakes and milkshakes. Staring out to the street, Danny is honestly thankful no one came out since everyone is used to loud noises from Fenton Works. Though them ignoring a straight-up helicopter is pretty sad. Impressive, but sad. 

Danny elects to spend the day with the giant green bow attached to his head, because why not. Ordering a skittles, cream cheese, and tater tots smoothie from Hobson, “of course sir”, being his only response. He picks up his phone to call Tucker; leaning back in a chair, “dude, you are not going to believe this. Vlad sent me a gift and not only does it not suck, the only thing creepy about it so far is the dead badger tail”.

_“Does that say something about us that that qualifies as not much of a problem?”._

“I’m positive it does, but that’s a problem for my sister”.

_“True dude. Anyways, what’d that nut case get you? That you felt the need to call me right after?”._

“Well let’s see, it can go nearly four-hundred km/h and will make Technus drool”.

_“Dude! A car! Wow for once he doesn’t suck. I so have to see that when I get there. Also, that sounds insanely fast for a car, what did he even get you?”_

“Lykan something, but Tuck dude. A freaking helicopter dropped it in the front yard”.

_“Well Vlad is nothing if not extra, though if it’s pink Sam will mock you relentlessly”._

“Hell no, though he was a cheeky bastard with the colours. Can’t say I’m complaining though. Black and white is my thing after all”.

Tucker laughs on the other end, _“wow, you’d think your parents would be suspicious by now. Anyways, I’ll see you in an hour or two and you are taking us for a drive!”._

Hanging up, he’s tempted to call Sam but he kind of wants to see her face when she sees he’s got a car too now. 

* * *

Danny goes through six more smoothies and managed to finally make Hobson barf, black licorice with onions and sunflower seeds smells pretty bad apparently. While watching some reruns Sam and Tucker both show up, in Sam’s bubblegum pink hearse. Apparently, she was given the option to either pick the kind of car or the colour, not both. Parking the hearse in the Fenton driveway, the two don’t even bother knocking on the door, as they barge in. They are immediately greeted by a grinning Danny with a giant green bow on his head.

Tucker laughs and flicks the bow, “dude what? That’s a little on the nose”, as Sam rolls her eyes. Danny smirks, “it’s ectogreen, I had to”, then grinning devilishly, “so want to do something stupid and race cars?”. Jazz glares at them from the kitchen but knows it is rather pointless to stop her brother, who can make himself literally untouchable. All the trio knows is high-wire living and Danny’s self-preservation is beyond brutalised.

Sam, rather surprised, “Danny what? Really? They got you a car too?”. Danny shrugs, “well my parents’ got me a person actually”, Danny points over his shoulder at Hobson; who’s now making a gummy bear and seaweed milkshake. “As for the car? that was Vlad actually, yeah surprising I know”, Danny smirks at Sam’s surprised face, “Sam, the birthday card alone is made of gold and silver. I’m positive he’s trying to butter me up again, but the car _is_ very nice”, Danny sticks his finger in the direction of the garage for them to follow.

Sam snickers as her and Tucker do indeed follow, “let me guess, green bow for a green car and that it’s too small for your dad to drive?”. Making Danny smirk, opening up the garage door, “small? yes, green? no, and even your parents would be impressed”. 

His two friends stare at the impressive car, even Sam’s parents’ don’t have cars this expensive looking. Meanwhile, Hobson brings Danny a cupcakes and horseradish smoothie along with the gummy bear seaweed one. Tucker stares, “dude, your parents really _did_ just buy you a butler huh?”, Danny nods at Tucker as he pulls out his keys. 

Sam is standing behind the driver's door as Danny snickers at her, which earns a confused look from the goth. Then the doors open backwards and force her to stumble back. Sam follows the doors with her eyes, “what in the? Where did he even find a car that opens like this?”, Danny just shrugs at Sam’s confusion. Opening up the side door, he lets both of them climb in and flings the manual at Tucker. Sam, noticing the seats, “very cybergoth”.

Tucker is practically feeling up the electronic dashboard with neon green holograms on it. Noticing that, Danny points out, “apparently there’s also a pop-out hologram so that, according to Vlad, I can drive it alone without getting into trouble for not having a license yet”. Tucker immediately jumps out of the shotgun seat as he pushes a green button with an M on it. 

A Maddie hologram pops out into shotgun and waves at the driver's seat. 

All three jump, Danny grumbling, “fuck that’s creepy, should have guessed though”. Sam and Tucker both nod at Danny as Tucker passes his hand through it, “it’s impressively real-looking though. You actually might not get ticketed with this”, Tucker grins evilly. The two friends get out and let Danny in, they head outside to wait for him to pull out. Both of them accept, to Hobson’s pleasure, normal strawberry milkshakes from the butler. 

Danny pulls out of the garage pretty smoothly for a beginner, though all three have driven illegally in Sam’s pink hearse many times. Not to mention Danny has driven all sorts of crazy things. Danny drives the thing backwards and spins it around sharply to drift in right next to the hearse, the car shakes from the sudden stop as Danny shows a cocky grin. Which both Jazz and Jack can clearly see from the window. 

While Jazz shakes her head, Jack beams with pride, “look at him go, already defying the rules of the road. Just like his old man”. Jack wipes away a small tear from his eye. 

Tucker laughs wildly as Sam glares, “what? you watched Fast and Furious again?”. Danny wiggles his eyebrows, “not yet but I am looking for ideas”. Opening up the side door and bending the seat forward, “now are you two getting in or what. I already gave my mom whiplash, it’s your turn”, Danny turns his head to Tucker. “I wasn’t kidding about zero to a-hundred in around two seconds”, Danny smirks as Sam goes wide-eyed while climbing in the -very small- back. 

Sam’s head brushes against the ceiling. Her glancing up and muttering, “Danny, there is no way you’ll fit back here. Hell, I don’t even think there’s supposed to be a back here”. Danny laughs, “it’s mine why would I be in the back? I’m just impressed the front seats are low enough for me to fit anyways”. 

The still a short shit Tucker glares, “damn you and your growth spurt”. Sam rolls her eyes, “it’s more than that Tucker. Unlike someone, Danny actually gets a freakish amount of exercise”. Tucker waves her off as Danny smirks slamming the pedal down without warning, just as they buckle in.

Tucker near-instantly shouting, “HOLY SHIT! DON’T KILL US!”, as they hit a-hundred and forty km/h in four seconds. Danny slows down, smirking as he notices a very startled cop who doesn’t even make an attempt to go after them. Laughing his ass off now with pure adrenaline, as another cop pulls up next to them at a red light and stares. Danny rolls the window down so the cop can both see and speak to him, all the while wearing a crazed grin.

“You’re a Fenton kid aren’t you?”.

Danny smirks, “yes sir and it’s my birthday”, and laughs loudly. As the cop just tips his hat and drives away once the light turns green. Though Danny can hear him mutter, “fuck that, so long as they don’t kill anyone, it’s not my problem”.

Tucker shakes his head in amazement, vibrating a little from the adrenaline, “wow dude, how did you not get pulled over for that? That was, like, at least double the speed limit”. Danny smirks as both he and Sam speak in unison, “Fenton’s don’t get pulled over”.

Danny drives around for a while, randomly speeding up just for shits and giggles. Eventually, he gets where he’s going and they’re on a long deserted stretch of road. “Oh fuck yeah”, comes out of Tucker’s mouth as he grins like an idiot. Both he and Sam hold on as Danny guns it. Danny shouts, “Fuckin’ Ancients yeah! That book was not lying about top speed! Fourteen freaking seconds!”, and laughs like a loon as he proceeds to do sharp turns and donuts as fast as he can, in an abandoned parking lot. Sam and Tucker clinging onto whatever they can for dear life, smiling gleefully all the while. 

* * *

Meanwhile, Vlad is watching through a camera; that he knows they’ll find and take out sooner rather than later. “Maybe this wasn’t the greatest idea, since when did he even know how to really drive? And is his self-preservation really this destroyed? The world isn’t a racing movie, boy!”, Vlad shakes his head as Danny quickly snaps the car in the opposite direction. Sending Sam and Tucker slamming into their prospective doors and lifting the tires up a bit. Danny, laughing and grinning all the while. Vlad pours himself some whiskey.

* * *

Back with the trio, Danny is driving home as all three laugh filled with adrenaline. Danny grins, “imagine if I could fly this fast! I know I’m up to two-hundred and eighty now but still! And that g force!”. Tucker excitedly whacks him on the arm repeatedly, “you can barely even feel that when you fly! Holy shit dude!”.

Danny’s voice is downright giddy, “I know! Flying is lazy and light, this is like flinging my self at a bunch of walls and liking the impact!”, as the three get out of the now parked car. Sam smacks him on the shoulder as she’s still catching her breath, “you are so taking this to school”. Danny finger guns at her, “don’t you know it! I’ll get there early and let everyone wonder whose car it is till the end of the day!”. 

Tucker flops on the floor once in the house, laughing from the ground, “dude, that is going to be great! And who are we kidding? You are a menace!”. 

“A menace with a really nice car”, Danny points to him as he flops the manual on Tucker’s stomach, “you’re the techno-geek, have fun”. Tucker would glare but he’s far too interested.

Just as Hobson is giving Danny a peanut butter and Laffy Taffy milkshake Tucker starts hitting him, “dude! This thing is fucking _bulletproof_! Not only that but I can easily put a ghost shield in!”. Danny laughs, “that frootloop did everything didn’t he? For once I’m glad my arch enemy is filthy rich!”.

Danny has exactly three more milkshakes before it’s time to go out to eat. Maddie shakes her head and smiles at him, practically announcing, “while you have a car now Danny, I think it would be best if we all went in the GAV”, much to Jazz’s pleasure for once. She wasn’t quite sure just what her brother was like on the road without her yet and seeing the stunt he pulled earlier, she doesn’t really want to. And to pretty much everyone’s surprise, the trio actually agrees. 

Once at the theatre Danny notices the cop from earlier, Danny smirks as the cop approaches. The cop eyes him a little, “it’s you again, I’d say I’m amazed you’re in one piece but I’m pretty sure you Fenton’s are indestructible”. Danny laughs since not only is it likely that he might just be indestructible but also because the cops shorter than him. 

Jazz glares and crosses her arms at Danny, as the officer leaves, “and what did you do?”. Tucker grins goofily, answering for Danny, “drove fast enough to give the cops buddy whiplash”. Jazz glares even harder as Danny starts laughs even harder, “ _Jazz_ , that thing speeds up freakishly fast, takes just over two seconds to get up to a-hundred. Vlad knew full well I’d end up speeding with it”, Danny waves her off as they head into the movies. 

She still shakes her head, “yeah well you still shouldn’t, Hell you shouldn’t even be driving without an adult”, at this Danny just shrugs. But then he leans and whispers to Jazz, “tell that to the Maddie hologram”. Jazz turns her head to him and makes a face that’s mutually horrified and disgusted. 

* * *

After the movie and supper, they all head home, Sam and Tucker staying over for an all-nighter movie marathon. Tucker asks a truly unnecessary question, “so obviously we’re watching the Fast And Furious movies?”. To which the rest of the trio give a “duh”. 

They manage to get through all the movies before it’s time for school. Danny was grinning wildly the whole time and it was incredibly obvious he was taking notes. As they head out to their cars, Tucker opting to go with Danny while Sam takes her own car.

Inside Danny’s car, Danny gives the dash a little pat, “so I think this thing is getting named The Phlying Phantom, with a Ph. Because I’m awful and own it”. Tucker snorts a laugh, “that is awful and the spelling seems like it would be awful too”. Danny one-handed finger guns at Tucker because he’s not quite crazy enough to drive with his knees, yet. He’s working on it. 

Unsurprisingly, they get there before Sam and break at least two laws. Danny’s also pretty sure he’s going to get very familiar with seeing startled and scowling cops. Tucker chuckles as he gets out, “you’d think for being a hero you’d have more respect for the law!”. 

The two just stand there and watch the doors close, still impressed by the weird-ass doors. Tucker elbows him, “you should totally open the trunk”. Danny raises an eyebrow but indulges Tucker without asking. The two watch as the trunk splits in two and opens out and upwards in two separate parts like a pair of metal wings. Danny’s jaw drops as Tucker whistles, “wow that looks way cooler than the manual implied”. 

And that’s how Sam finds them, after parking next to Danny’s car; she too turns to gape at the weirdest trunk doors ever. She shakes her head, “now that’s just being extra”. While Danny starts to smile, “that’s exactly why I’m putting my backpack in the trunk for my ride home, Tuck?”. Tucker just smirks and fist bumps Danny.

* * *

By the time lunch has rolled around half the school is talking about the crazy white and black sports car in the parking lot. Everyone has ruled out every rich kid they know of, mostly due to the colour alone. Well except one kid who knew whose it was the second he heard the colour.

Wes approaches the trio’s table and practically growls at Danny, “the sports car’s yours, isn’t it Phantom”. Danny simply smiles in return causing Wes to toss his hands up, “of course it is! Are you just mocking me and everyone else?”, Danny shrugs before responding, “actually, you can blame the mayor for this one”, Danny laughs as Wes practically slams his tray on the table and stomps off.

Tucker snickers, “he loves you, doesn’t he”. Both Sam and Danny laugh, Danny putting a hand to his chest and makes a show of looking insanely egotistical, “well how couldn’t he? After all he knows the fantastical and fabulous Phantom!” Danny sticks his finger in the air for added emphasis.

Not even five minutes later the trio overhears Dash and Kwan before lunch finishes. 

“Dude, I _so_ want to know whose got that awesome car!”.

“I know, I would sell most of my organs for that”.

“Whoever they are, they’d for sure have to be a cool kid or an A-lister!”.

“Well it’s obviously not one of us, but dude. Do you want to stick around to see that baby startup and actually _drive_?”.

“Well duh, who wouldn’t?”.

The two guys notice the trio, who are all snickering to themselves. Dash shouting at them, “well I guess Fentit and the merry band of freaks wouldn’t!”. Earning an eye roll from every member of the trio.

Kwan smirks, “yeah, dude. What would they even know about a nice car?”, as the two jocks head off. Dash tosses his leftovers at Danny for emphasis, but Danny bats it away with Wes’s tray. 

* * *

As the three walk out to the parking lot no one’s surprised, since not only is Sam’s laughably pink hearse there but they all assume the resident weirdo trio want to see who owns the car too. Who wouldn’t? 

Danny notices someone leaning against the driver door before Sam and Tucker do. Quickly he realises it’s Dexter, a nineteen-year-old held back twelfth-grader. If he remembers correctly, Dexter is, or was, the only student with a sports car. Danny speaks nonchalantly as he twirls his keys, “well I guess it’s not surprising to see you, of all people, being so chill about touching a sports car”, walking up to his car, “care to get off my car door, buddy?”, Danny’s tone is slightly unpleasant as everyone in earshot gapes. Some people, who didn’t hear Danny, are pointing to the keys he’s swinging and whispering. 

“Ah, so you’re the so-called ‘cool kid’ with the new sports car?”, Dexter’s tone is mocking. Noticing this Danny pushes his keys to open the trunk, causing the right trunk door to open straight up, blocking Dexter's view; as Danny and Tucker walk up and toss their bags in. Multiple gasps can be heard from the crowd as everyone clues in that the ‘cool guy car’ belongs to one of the freaky loser weirdo trio.

Dexter is actually pretty impressed, he hasn’t seen a car like this before and doesn’t know the make off the top of his head. Which makes him think that it must be a more expensive one. He only made a habit to learn the affordable ones; because what kid would have an expensive one? This kid apparently. 

Getting off the door and sticking his head around the trunk door just as Danny signals for it to close and responds to Dexter’s question. “Yup, black and white is sorta my thing in case you can’t tell by my wardrobe”, Danny gestures to his white wife-beater, black leather jacket, and black military pants; the look finished off by white doc martins. 

Dexter smirks, “well I haven’t even seen a make like this, so how did you, of all people, get it?”. Danny chuckles and puts his hands in the air in mock surrender, “mayors gift, people seem to think I’m kidding when I say we’re well acquainted with each other. Close family friend and all. And if you _must_ _know_ it’s a W Motors Lykan Hypersport, and it has a lot of emeralds and gold in it”. Tucker laughs as he leans over to Dexter, “simply put, it’s a sports car on crack”. 

Danny nods as he laughs a bit, then noticing Dash coming up, he smirks, “why hello there Dash, come to ogle my car as well?”.

Dash scowls at him with clear disgust, “no way this is yours, Fentoilet!”. Danny grins very meanly, and jeers, “oh I don’t know Dash, I’m pretty sure a fair amount of people saw the three of us flying around in it yesterday”. Sam simply smirks as she leans against her own car, letting Danny fight his own battles.

Dexter, meanwhile, is both shocked and impressed, “this baby must cost quite the penny then”, then blatantly challenging the boy, “and why don’t you _prove_ it’s yours”. Dexter goes to stand up in front of Danny, as Dash just watches. Even Dash doesn’t mess with a twelfth grader known for setting things on fire and breaking people’s noses. Danny however, doesn’t seem to care, “pretty sure I already did”. Dexter laughs cruelly and crosses his arms, “naw man, if you drove it here you can drive it out, can’t ya?”. Danny raises an eyebrow, kind of confused, “um duh, that’s half the point of having one”. 

Dexter smirks, finding himself amused by this kid who’s clearly not as spineless as rumours suggest, “oh? and what would the other half of the point be? Care to enlighten us?”, a couple of people in the crowd snicker. While Danny’s grin verges on manic, “to go fast, why else would you drive a sports car of any kind?”. 

Dexter throws his head back and laughs, “you really don’t give a shit do you? Well if that’s the case, there’s an abandoned strip of road leading to a deserted mall and parking lot; know it?”. All of the trio can’t help but laugh, since they were just there yesterday. Danny sticks his hands in his pockets and grins wily, “of course, left some burnt rubber there on more than one occasion”. 

At this point,everyone at Casper high are starting to think Danny is a bit tougher than they thought. Dash’s jaw is completely dropped as he exclaims, “but you just turned sixteen? You can’t even have a drivers yet?”. A few heads around nod as Dexter raises an eyebrow. Sam laughs, finally interjecting into this conversation, “that doesn’t matter if you’re a Fenton, cops won’t touch them. Too many cops get hurt when they try!” 

Danny snickers, “what can I say, my dad’s driving breaks a few laws of physics”, ending with a shrug. Dexter squares the muscular Danny up again, “well then that settles it then, met me by the exit to the abandoned road in an hour”. Dexter then turns his head over his shoulder as he walks away, giving a slightly malicious, “good luck”. 

The trio all laugh as Danny opens the doors and half the crowd makes “oooo”’s and “ahhhh”’s at the weird backwards opening doors. Dash follows Danny around and watches him get in the car, “you’re nuts Fenton”. Danny starts up the Phlying Phantom as he laughs, “what’s new?”. A couple people in the crowd mutter that the Fenton kid had a point; every Fenton was just the far side of utterly nuts.

Sam hops in her hearse as Danny aggressively swings his car out of its spot and shoots out of the parking lot at a -slow for the car- fifty km/h. The whole crowd gaping as Sam smirks and drives off after them.

* * *

Dash blinks and stares down at the dust the car tires kicked up, “I can’t fucking believe it? That loser not only has a car, but a sports car?”.

“I know, just doesn’t make sense”, is all Kwan can think to say as he shakes his head.

Meanwhile, Wes is muttering, “of course Phantom is having a drag race, of course no one thinks anything of the colour choice, of course he has a sports car...”, at this moment, Wes really truly deeply _hates_ Phantom. Stupid ghostly bastard. 

* * *

Tucker practically cackles, “dude! That was awesome! You have a car for two days and you’re already putting it through the ringer!”, and laughs his ass off from shotgun. Danny grins as he heads to fill up and then home for supper. Elbowing Tucker on the way, “Tuck, you are so going to have to put a bass booster in here”; Tucker nods enthusiastically. 

Danny pushes his way in through the front door, “hey Jazz, gonna just grab some food and go”, and shovels a few of the tater tots in his mouth, grabbing up a burger. Jazz sticks her head in the kitchen, “Danny you just got back?”, squinting at him, “what are you up to?”. Danny makes a motion that looks like steering a steering wheel, mouth full. Jazz sighs a bit fondly, remembering when she got her first real car, “I guess I can’t blame you”, putting a hand on her hip, “but you really should have an adult, an adult like me, with you”. 

Danny rolls his eyes and waves her off with his free hand. Jazz goes to step in front of him, prompting him to raise an eyebrow and quickly chew and swallow all the tater tots. Which if it wasn’t for body manipulation, would have been very painful; Jazz grimaces. While he speaks, “Jazz, I'm fine, it’s not like I haven’t drove alone a bunch of times before”. Jazz sighs and shakes her head disappointedly, “don’t do anything stupid, little brother. But I’m coming with you unless you give me a damn good reason not to”. 

Danny groans and checks the time. Rubbing his neck, “you hate dad’s fast driving as it is, and well, fast driving is what’s happening”. Jazz immediately clues in that Danny’s doing something both stupid and illegal, “Danny! Yes I’m coming with you. At least to watch and make sure you don’t fuck yourself up”. Danny deflates, “fine, I guess, but you’re in the back and you’re _not_ riding later. Gotta go now though”. 

Jazz raises a brow as Tucker lets her climb in the back, her asking, “so clearly something specific is going on, so spill”, Danny groans. While Tucker turns around to answer, “there’s only one other kid, well he’s not a kid but still, at school with a sports car. So now there’s a drag race”.

“What! Danny! That is more than just stupid and illegal!”, Jazz shoves her head forwards as far as her seatbelt will allow. Danny just shrugs as he drives to the abandoned road.

* * *

Dexter smirks as he sees Danny’s Lykan pulling up next to the sidewalk before the abandoned road, after looking up this car he knows he’d lose to anyone who was actually an experienced driver, but with this kid he’ll be able to brag about besting the car. Shrugging to himself, he’ll just leave out the age of the driver during his bragging.

Tucker opens the passenger door to let both himself and Jazz out, a mash-up of every Skrillex song at once can be heard from inside the car as the two go and stand with Sam and a bunch of other people from Tucker’s grade.

Star shakes her head at Tucker, “I can’t believe Danny actually has a car like that”. The two had become somewhat friendly to each other ever since their dating stint. Tucker smirks, “you should see the hologram stuff it’s got inside and the seats are literally _stitched with gold_ ”. Star blinks a few times, “wait, you mean he was serious when he said there was gold and emeralds in it?”. Tucker nods, “there’s something like four-hundred emeralds in the headlights alone. But that’s what you get for over four mil”, shrugging. 

Kwan, nearby, starts coughing and staggers up to Tucker, “what do you mean ‘four mil’? As in _million_?”. Tucker chuckles, “Yeah, exactly. It’s normally only three and a half mil but Vladdie got it done custom”. Kwan just stares at him and shakes his head.

Danny pulls up next to Dexter as he cuts the music, “so quick question, you think you can take this easy because you think I’m inexperienced due to my age, right?”. Dexter blinks a couple times and frowns, “you’re only sixteen and don’t even have a licence yet, what kind of driving experience could you possibly have”. Danny laughs, “I’ve driven or flown everything from assault vehicles to a jet”. Dexter looks at him mildly concerned, pretty sure he also heard the boy mutter, “and there was that one notable time involving a spaceship”, as it approaches time to go. 

Danny can’t help but laugh as the, ever so stereotypically scantily clad lady who’s probably someone’s girlfriend, walks up and signals for them to go. 

Danny doesn’t waste any time in straight-up gunning it, being used to the fast and crazy life, his head doesn’t even snap back from the g-force. He winds up going around three-hundred and eighty in about fifteen seconds. Laughing his head off as he cranks the wheel around one of the turns in the road. Looking to the mirror he sees how far back Dexter is, so he decides to fuck around and make Jazz really regret coming. So he spins around harshly, flying his hair the totally wrong way, and starts driving backwards without even looking behind him. He waves back at the gaping Dexter as he just starts randomly driving his car all over the road, drifting sideways at points, and eventually whipping around to face forwards again; grinning like a completely insane idiot. He whizzes into the parking lot and does a couple of random high-speed donuts before parking. Opening his door he goes and lays on the roof, waiting for Dexter to eventually get there. 

* * *

Meanwhile, Vlad is staring in horror at the screen slowly starting to question the sanity of the young halfa, “what have I done?”. He’d watched as Daniel jerked the wheel around pulling donuts of increasingly tighter loops only to suddenly jerk and go the opposite direction. He could tell by the tilting of the screen that the wheels left the ground multiple times. Listening to the manic laughter of Daniel and seeing his massive grin, all the while. “I’m starting to think Daniel might just be right in the ‘halfas are either indestructible or immortal’ theory. That, or my little badger has a death wish”, with that the older halfa rubs his trembles but doesn’t turn off the device.

* * *

Back with Sam, Tucker and Jazz. Sam and Tucker are both laughing their asses off while Jazz looks just as shocked as everyone else at just _how_ fast Danny’s car is. “Holy...”, is all Dash’s two remaining brain cells can put together. 

Tucker wheezes out, “I-I think that-that Danny might have a bit of a-a adrenaline addiction!”, while Sam pats him on the shoulder humorously. Jazz decides that if they ever have to flee anything, Danny is driving. 

* * *

Danny turns his head as Dexter pulls up next to his car, Dexter is shaking his head as he drives up, “you are one crazy guy, but mad props for pulling that stunt and not wrecking your car”, Dexter tosses a large wad of money at Danny who grabs it confused. Dexter laughs at this, “you won dude, even if you clearly did this for shits”. 

With that Dexter drives off, leaving Danny to fiddle with the money, “well okay then, I feel like a tornado attempting to take a nap and now I have money in my winds”, Danny looks around and then phases inside his car. Unwrapping the wad he flings the cash all over his dashboard just to be dramatic, he starts The Phyling Phantom back up. Jerking the wheel harshly sending the car snapping around in a tight circle as he floors it back to his friends, cash flying around inside. He winds up flying past Dexter, _again_ , who just blinks, startled by the sudden wind as Danny is grinning widely with his chest pushed up against the wheel. 

Danny cranks his wheel and yanks the emergency brake to drift sideways and come to a stop about two feet from Sam and Tucker, who are the only ones’ who don’t jump out of the way of the oncoming car driven by a probably indestructible halfa. Opening the door, Danny flops out laughing his ass off, with a fifty stuck in his hair, “Ancients this thing is bloody fun and yes Tuck, I’m totally down to see just how you can soup this up to even more insane levels”. Tucker laughs, “just don’t ask your dad! You’ll wind up with it covered in F’s and poor taste guns!”.

Sam and Tucker high-five the grounded Danny as Kwan looks inside the car and sees money all over the place, “I guess there’s no way you couldn’t have won, but since when did you even know how to drive?”, Kwan asks what most of the crowd wants to know just as Dexter arrives back. No one even gives Dexter any mocking for losing because of the clearly over powered car his opponent was driving. Danny waves at him from the ground as he answers Kwan, “dude, you can’t be a Fenton and not know how to drive the assault vehicle. It might not speed up as fast but it can go _way_ faster than the average car. It is meant to chase ghosts after all”. Most of the crowd nod in agreement; Fenton Works was a family business after all. 

Danny’s righted himself by the time Dexter gets over to them, Dash joins them as well. Dexter smirks down at the boy, “well man, you’ve won your first race and own an insane car. Care if I look?”, at this point, Dexter likes this kid and fully intends to laugh at anyone who claims this kid is some weak loser. 

Dash’s face light up, hoping to get a look too. Danny raises his eyebrow at the bully, “last I checked anything that was mine was instantly uncool. But then again it’s not like you were ever informed on many things”, turning to Dexter, “go ahead dude, you probably know more about it than I do”. 

While Dexter jumps in, leaving the door open though. Dash pipes up, “Fenton, no one could taint a freaking _sports car_ , not even the biggest freak in the school”. Kwan taps his chin, “I’m amazed your parents didn’t get pissed at the Phantom paint job though, what with being hunters and all”. A couple of people nod in the crowd while Tucker groans, knowing full well what Danny named it. 

Danny chuckles, “they didn’t even mention it, not like I picked the colours anyways. It does fit me though and that’s also why I named it The Phlying Phantom”. Even Dash seems to be impressed by the name choice and many people laugh, while Jazz pinches her nose. Her muttering, “you are just asking for trouble little brother”. 

Dexter sticks his head out the door as Dash sticks his in but not touching a single thing, Dexter rolls his eyes at the blonde before shouting at Danny “dude, this thing’s custom isn’t it? There shouldn’t even _be_ seats in the back and the window tint is complete blackout from the outside with a green tint. Is that even legal?”. Danny laughs, “oh yeah it definitely isn’t, cops won’t do shit about it though. Vladdie even put extra hologram stuff in and I think an under glow. Which, also illegal. Cost him an extra half mil, apparently”. 

Dexter shakes his head at Danny before walking back to his own car and slapping its roof, “well see you at school you wild weirdo”.

Eventually, everyone starts taking their leave and Sam takes Tucker home. Jazz follows Danny into The Phlying Phantom, turns to him, and practically shouts, “you insane idiot! I can’t believe you’d be so reckless and stupid!”. Danny just waves her off as he buckles up, “my very existence is reckless, your point?”. Danny laughs as Jazz pushes some cash out from under her before she buckles up herself, glaring at him the whole time. 

On their drive home Danny’s ghost sense goes off, he smirks and jerks the car in that direction before Jazz can even say “no”. Funny enough it’s actually Johnny and Kitty, and Johnny has clearly souped up his bike again. Danny’s honestly impressed they’ve actually stopped at the red light, so much to his sisters complaining, he pulls up next to them. 

Johnny eyes Danny’s ride, not able to see who’s inside, and whistles. Even Kitty gives it an impressed smirk as Johnny says, “well guess I’m not the only person in this town with something that’s got some real speed and power?”. Johnny chuckles to himself deviously before asking, “care for a race?”. 

Jazz slams her head on the dashboard as Danny goes to roll down the window. “What’s up Johnny? And I don’t see why not, I could do with winning two tonight”, Danny grins at Johnny’s shocked but then impressed face. Kitty, however, looks really damn pleased, “well looks like we won’t be winning by ghostly cheating, Phantom. Hope you’re content to drive straight up some buildings”. To which Danny just laughs as the light turns green and he’s off to the races again. Jazz just squeezes her chair and silently prays to escape death.

Unsurprisingly they indeed wind up driving straight up and sideways on a few buildings, Jazz screams as Danny goes off a damn crane and floats the car down to the park. Johnny pulling up behind, “respect dude, it’s clear us ghostly folks have the monopoly on speed”. Danny laughs manically, “well I have a new appreciation for fast vehicles that’s for sure, and this thing has officially lived up to the name of Phyling Phantom!”. Kitty herself laughs at Danny’s on the nose naming before the couple wave and drive off. 

Danny spins the back of the car and peels it out of the park, going a little too fast on the road; getting himself promptly pulled over. Johnny and Kitty watch, smirking from a distance; they picked the most heavily patrolled area for this very reason. 

“Hey Jazz, climb into the back would you?”. Jazz glares at him but does as she’s told. Speaking up once she’s seated and buckled, “the fuck is wrong with you Danny, and you know I can’t be your adult from the back”. Danny smirks as he pushes the big M button, “I want to see if this will really work”. 

Jazz doesn’t even have time to be confused as the Maddie hologram springs out and smiles at the drivers seat. Jazz blinks and grimaces deeply at it, “what the fuck Danny? Did Vlad really seriously put that in? Because that is either really sneaky and I’m not impressed, or that’s really creepy and I’m not impressed”. Danny draws a V in the air just as the officer knocks on his window. 

Rolling his window down, Danny smiles at the officer, ‘Maddie’ waves. Danny speaks like he’s trying to sound like he’s pretending to be innocent, “what’s up sir? Just enjoying a night-time drive”, and gives an overly large slightly unnerving smile. 

The cop moves his flashlight from Danny to the hologram that somehow actually reacts like a person to the light, and then to Jazz. The man huffs, “Fenton’s huh? Well I hope you were chasing something in that park and I hope you caught it, good night”, the cop spins on his heels and books it away from, what he believes is, one of the two highly destructive Fenton parents’ and their apparently equally reckless child. 

Johnny shakes his head as Kitty smiles, Johnny can’t even make himself feel annoyed, “got to hand it to the kid, he’s always got something up his sleeve”. Kitty giggles, “and he is starting to get some spook points in the scaring department”. Johnny nods with a laugh as the ghostly couple fully drive off into the night. 

As Danny puts the Maddie hologram away Jazz stares in shock, “Vlad has issues for one, for two he has given you too much power. Now let’s go home, at a _reasonable_ speed”. Danny laughs, “death gave me too much power first!”. Which, yeah was true. 

* * *

Vlad, meanwhile, is unsure if he agrees with Jasmine or if he’s simply quite pleased with himself over the sight of Daniel’s laughing face. It seems he made the right move regarding the boy for a change, even if that was possibly, somehow, much more dangerous for everyone involved.

**End.**

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Vlad buys Danny a car for his 16th birthday


End file.
